To Homeschool or Not to Homeschool?

So I've been thinking about homeschooling my kids.

This is only funny to people who know me really, really well. Because me? Not the best teacher. I'm too impatient and easily distracted (bird!). And I barely graduated high school. Like one-point-less-on-my-GPA-and-I-woulda-been-repeating-senior-year barely.

Which is why, when the subject of home-schooling ever came up, I'd give some variation of the "I'm sure it's great for you but it wouldn't work for me" answer.

But for the past year, I feel like I've kept getting nudged in that direction, as if a deer were gently pressing it's nose against my back to lead me down a certain mountain path. Nothing too aggressive. Wouldn't want to spook me.

Yes, to answer your unspoken question, some of my reasons are politically motivated. I ain't loving what I'm hearing about Common Core and it's apparent predilection for indoctrination. And the data-mining? Yikes! The rampant political correctness that leads to home-made lunches being inspected and taken way or young boys being expelled for making gun-fingers? Yeesh!

Those problems, however, are abstract for me. I haven't seen much of that going on at Alta View Elementary, where Griffin is attending Kindergarten. In fact, so far I LOVE Alta View. They've been every thing I hoped and dreamed an elementary school could be. And I'm so excited for him to start Spanish Immersion next year.

But ... nudge, nudge ... I saw this great article about why doctors and lawyers are turning to homeschooling and I've looked at some curriculum options they have and did you know that on average, home-schooled kids test considerably higher on standardized tests than their public school counterparts?

So to get that deer's nose off my back, I really thought about what was preventing me from homeschooling. Then I really analyzed how valid those concerns were.

1. The stigma: If I pull my kids out of school, what will the neighbors think!? *bites nails* To this the deer says, if that's your only reason, grow a backbone. No one knows what's best for your kids better than you. If you're deciding your kids' fate based on what other people think you should do, you'll end up exhausted and your kids will end up in therapy.

2. TIME! I ain't gonna lie. I have often DREAMED of the day when my kids are in school and I have seven blissful hours (minus the commute) all to myself! When I had a job, this seemed like the end goal - a waiting game. If I could make it to those years, my job would be a cake-walk compared to the nightmare of juggling work and kids 24 hours a day, seven days a week. But then I got laid off so ... now I just want the free time to do laundry in peace, without being screamed at every five minutes.

The deer says first off, in about eighteen years, I'll have all the free time I could possibly want and that time will go faster than I could ever imagine. He (she? The deer has not revealed it's gender and I'm too polite to look) also says between the commuting and school-related errand-running, how much time am I saving? Plus a little research revealed that home schooling doesn't take seven hours, like public schooling. You can generally get all the work done in four hours. And then PLAY for the rest of the DAY!

Plus, I hate to admit this because it makes me sound so clingy, but the idea of Griffin being gone ALL DAY at school every day breaks my heart. It just doesn't feel natural that he should spend nearly HALF his childhood in a classroom. Add to that the homework that he'll have to do once he finally gets home, and when do I get to hang with my kid!? Maybe it wouldn't be like that in first grade, but I intend to push him to do his academic best, to take the hard classes, to excel on every assignment. So that mudslide of homework is definitely in our future.

Times that by the other two kids I got here and the potential time away from them doesn't feel so luxurious anymore.

3. The smarts: Do I think I'm as smart and capable as a teacher, someone who has gone to college and studied how to impart knowledge and wisdom to the masses? Er, no. Could I walk into a classroom of 30 kids and teach them the multiplication tables? Er, no. But, the deer nudges, could I teach MY kids the multiplication tables, one on one, using their strengths and individual learning styles to their advantage? That's not so crazy. In fact, I wonder if a mom could do as good a job if not better than a teacher if she only has her own children to teach, rather than a full classroom of kids with different learning styles and abilities.

But could I be consistent? Could I follow through and be fair and find a way to get my kids to sit still and pay attention when they need to? Because, I don't know if you've ever seen me in church, but so far, I can't even get my kids to sit still for an hour once a week, let alone four hours every day. And how do I set up a classroom in my house? And keep track of the schoolwork?

The deer tells me the answers I seek are on Pinterest.

4.The social factor: It's like currency - being able to talk to people, fit in with different groups, make friends. People who have good social skills are much happier and more successful than those who don't know how to navigate the culture around them. So it stands to reason that if I keep my kids in my living room all day every day -- their only interaction with the outside world a quick peek through a dusty window before I catch them and scream at them to GET AWAY! GET AWAY from the window before you see something out there I can't protect you from!! -- then maybe I'm severely handicapping them in a fast-moving and competitive world.

The deer reminds me - kids who homeschool are entitled to attend and participate in all the activities available at their local school. Wanna tryout for the play? Sure. Join the basketball team? Go ahead. And apparently, these homeschoolers stick together - you can participate in homeschool co-ops where you teach along with other families; do field trips together; form special clubs. Also, the deer nudges, because you're spending so much less time getting the learning in, you have more time to take them out in the world, to sign them up for activities, sports, field trips, visits to the senior center or soup kitchens.

And, the deer points out -- how does putting children in a room with a bunch of kids their own age make them more socially adept? Wouldn't a child who is exposed to people from lots of different age brackets, lots of different backgrounds and experiences, be more prepared to enter different situations? And isn't it true that when you group kids by age, peer pressure becomes considerably more intense?

5. Now the deer knows he's winning because my next question is: What if it's fun? What if I enjoy teaching my children; watching them learn and grow? Finding what excites them and following that? Discovering their strengths and how to magnify them; figuring out their weaknesses and how to minimize them. I mentioned before that I wasn't great at school. But the reason wasn't that I was stupid - I just fell through the cracks, got lost in the shuffle. What if that happened to one of my kids and they never got close to realizing their potential? What if this was a second chance for me to learn alongside them all the things I missed as I was stumbling through my own education?

The deer nods his head wisely.
Ermergherd! I lerv learning!

BUT. But Griffin loves school. He only goes for three hours a day and is in a fairly protected environment, but still. Loves.

And I think AJ would have just as much fun making new friends and running circles around her future teachers. For all the scary news stories and dire warnings, for all the information about how America's children keep falling behind the rest of the world, is public school really that bad? Especially in suburban Utah where I'm guaranteed an army of involved moms who are just as concerned about giving their kids a good education as I am?

Maybe I'm over-analyzing the public school system. Maybe I'm romanticizing homeschooling. I'm still researching and considering and hemming and hawing. At this point, it really could go either way.

It will be interesting to see where we end up.

Comments

  1. I might be able to shed some light on at least the common core (I may have mentioned this before, but I'm totes an English teacher in a public school). I've taught both the Utah State Core (which is what schools taught up until about 4 years ago) and the Common Core, and I can assure you that there is no "indoctrination" going on. Honestly, I was surprised at how similar they are. And no, I'm not just part of this evil system bent on leading our children astray. I've said this before, but teachers don't get paid enough to do any brainwashing. I just try to teach my kids to appreciate literature and writing. The common core is a good guideline for that.

    However, don't feel pressured to choose public schools if you think homeschooling is the best option for your kids. I've had a few students who have been homeschooled through elementary, and they've been quite pleasant, intelligent, and well-adjusted.

    Basically, your choice should be made on what you want your children's education to look like. For kids who are motivated and have good parental support at home (which it sounds like you've got in spades), public school is a perfectly viable choice.

    BTW, this is Alex Springer--CitizenPain is my bloggy name.

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  2. I think "indoctrination" happens even if you don't mean it to - in public school or at home. It doesn't have to be a negative word because if you're teaching religion some people say that's indoctrination, is that such a bad thing? So personally define that word.

    We tried the public school thing and it didn't work for my oldest. I now have 5 kids and they are all thriving and happy! Their childhood is so short and I like spending time with them and learning right along with them. It's not all sunshine but I am giving them what I think is best for them. I like not just pumping information in them to have them spit it out again but get them to think and enjoying learning. I can say lots of good things about homeschooling!

    The fact alone that you're considering options instead of choosing something blindly means your kids will be successful! Good luck in whatever you choose!

    (I am Jessica, Caitlin Taylor's sister, in Saratoga Springs.:)

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  3. Well, as your sister and a teacher-to-be, I'd be sad to not get your kids in my class. Do what you think is best, definitely. I know all anyone hears now is bad bad things about the education system and terrible teachers that don't care about your students, but we aren't all that way. One or two or a hundred bad teachers spread out in your child's educational career may give the educational system a bad rap. But I know I'm going to be a great teacher and I will care about my students because that's who I am. I want to be the favorite teacher in high school that gets invited to my ex-students' weddings and college graduations. Heaven knows I had my fair share of awful teachers (looking at you, Mr. Runolfson), but I have also had some amazing teachers that really helped me see my potential (yes, you, Mr. Melville). They are part of why I want to be a teacher. And I'm honestly STOKED to start my profession as an educator. It's the one thought that keeps me going here in college land.

    Anyway, that's my two cents on the matter. I've known some really cool kids that were homeschooled (granted, I've also run into some real strange ones too)...so if you decide this is right for Griff, AJ, and Hazel...I've got middle and high school science totally covered for ya. :)

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  4. Love the comments, everyone! Alex, I hope you're as awesome as your mom. She's in the record books as my all time favorite teacher. And Ariel, you're going to be such a great teacher! Though I do hope you get a kid just like you everyone once in awhile, to keep you honest.

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    Replies
    1. Dude...kids like me in my class would be bomb. Teacher's pets. And I like pets. Especially ones I'm not allergic to. A whole classful of Me's would be AWESOME. Seriously...perfect class. Ha ha ha ha! :)

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  5. I want to clarify, though - my problem with public schools is NOT the many great teachers there, or even the occasional bad ones. It's more the inefficient system in place that doesn't allow those teachers to really excel at their jobs.

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  6. So there's the possibility of sending them for part time, which may be easier in a junior high setting (keeping them home for this and that subject) depending on your school. But hey -- if your deer or your heart or your guts say to try it, try it. You can always (ALWAYS) change your mind, and that's not a sign of failure -- it's a sign of flexibility.

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  7. My biggest issue with homeschooling is the socialization one, simply because I've interacted with too many children who were homeschooled and simply didn't get the socialization skills. I know parents who do homeschooling very well, but they do sign their kids up for a lot of extra activities.

    Kids have to learn not only to interact with other kids, but take instructions from adults who aren't Mom or Dad. When they grow up and have a boss, that boss isn't going to treat them like a parent who will give them more leeway because they love them. School can give kids get their first experiences with those in authority positions who aren't family.

    And just because my husband deals with public school budgets, I have to throw this in. Yes, homeschooled kids can do the extra activities at the public school, but remember that those activities are funded by money allocated to the schools based on enrollment (so they don't get any money for homeschooled children to fund the programs). So each child that "tags along" but is not actually enrolled at the school stretches the limited dollars more. When it's your kid, you just care that your kid gets to participate, but it does add strain. Just something to think about.

    This doesn't mean I'm pro- or anti-homeschool, but these are also considerations. Good luck with the decision!

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